critics for my fourth draft

For this blog, I showed my teacher my fourth draft and she was able to give me feedback. She suggested that the voice-over (Sam) should re-record his voice and maybe get him to add some more questions for example she suggested questions like "what is really going on behind the smokescreen" and "clearly this is a growing issue, is this the healthy alternative". She also told me he is talking too fast as it appears overwhelming for the audience while watching, so I have organised to meet Sam and re-record just a few parts of the voiceovers. 

Another part of the critics she suggested was the synced voices for Ava, which I have since figured out and fixed. My teacher also didn't like the captions at the beginning as it says "Behind the smokescreen" and then underneath it says "a Millie Mangham documentary", I decided this didn't look how I wanted it to look as it appeared rushed and unprofessional. I have since changed it to make it more smooth running. The final critic was just adding in transitions and final music edits which I feel I have executed well.