Feedback from my first draft and where I can improve

 Feedback from my first draft.

After showing my teacher my first draft she has given me some constructive tips on how to improve my documentary. She talks about how I need to improve a broader range of music and fit it to the mood of the documentary. I need to create a clear start, beginning and end which needs to defined by the use of different music tracks. I need to add less 'filler' shots and make them more relevant to the documentary and make the captions more long as they are quite difficult to read. Another thing I need to consider is the opening, it needs to create more of a documentary vibe about it. After doing more research. into ITV documentaries I can replicate it to be more similar.